Climbing out of canyons for storied Rustic Coffee…

This may have been the best roll down a mountain in search of real milk for at-home coffee had since Taos.

The dad of the giant chihuahua & lil Lassie I’m hanging with for a few told me that Rustic Coffee was what made coming out Rustic canyon on foot worthwhile for locals as of late, worthiness being a vibration that had to factor into slipping out of the Shangri-La him & artheads like him carved into these particular cliffs 30 years ago beyond whatever they do now as journeymen.

He also said the closest milk was also the most ridiculously expensive in the Canyon grocer across the way from Rustic Coffee’s airstream.

“Its gorgeous. ..if you like that sort of thing, but~”

(EVERYONE reading here knows the Glyph gets on well with allll of such said things and was gonna be there with bells on eventually, once it was on the radar).

It’s only boots on the ground-in LA proper- that I have heard the praises sung of the Palisades as being harmoniously in key with the sirens that pulled me out west warbling about the joys artheads can (still) find up in Laurel Canyon.

It’s song has had an interesting lilt, a kinky, sweet backbeat to it this whole time exploring enclaves here… but it made it clear that a basecamp or two would be needed to truly get it.

So I waited until the spirit of this city orchestrated how it wanted to introduce itself to Globalboho and said “step right up. “

As of now I have a few sojourns scheduled in this vortex until 2024, in various laidback yet “architecturally important home” laden neighborhoods.

…But, how’s the coffee?

Pretty fucking fantastic.

I had the Awake, which was all the mushroom & MCT oil things you’d love to have layered on top of some serious beans (if you’re a wellness nerd who loves making your caffeine work for you with no crash, or at least have heard the lore and was curious), topped off with some whipped cream to convince your inner kid it was good for you, but still a lil bad so they(the inner child) can enjoy the medicine.

But what was even cooler was that this rustic coffee airstream started out on a lawn under the name sunrise brew and became a ground zero of sorts, a really cool, “on your way of to the beach” community nexus with the teeny canyon grocer, a small boutique and even an art gallery , tucked just far enough up Channel to be “away from the maddening crowds” & feel “truly local.” In LA? That can sometimes be hard to find &/or pull off.

& Apparently, the genius behind all the “speaks for itself” buzz, no marketing, not even an actual website is a chick from Virginia who Le Cordon Bleu’d out before making a name for herself catering and helming a few different locations all over LA: Tara Amiel.

The coffee was PHENOMENAL. But word on the street is the food is really the reason to stop by… before 3pm, pretty much everyday.

Rustic Coffee
169 W Channel Rd, Santa Monica, CA 90402  

Oh yeah. . . The milk.


Eight dollars.

But~{before apoplexy sets in}…

that’s for a ½Gallon of organic, “humane-certified” whole milk.


Humane-certified issa thing?Apparently so, though it begs the #thisisscifi query, “then wHo or wHaT tha fUq is certifying the other-“ That’d be “human- certified,” but we are so gonna put some writerhead flesh to those bizarre Freudian bones that rose up in the brain fart-)

Frankly, there’s the equivalent of bird shite, dyed sugarwater, pasturized to hell, “fat free,”cheap milk ” selling in California for $8 a gallon and people are buying it, nevermind the nutmilks. If I can buy a quart of goatmilk for like $8 at both Whole foods and Erewhon when there’s no (saner)Trader Joe’s around(I can…and do, for the healthy fat, baby) …I can’t bat a lash at $8 for 2 quarts(& dont).

Like was said earlier, with bells on, I was going to end up at least scoping that grocer.

What can I say? I dig real milk.

This entire Jack & Jill trek down the rustic canyon today happened because whilst bopping around the Erewhon in Palisades village yesterday I opted Out of grabbing that $8 quart of Meyersburg goatmilk To load in because I was too busy having fun in a long staved-off perfume mania mode to want to be lugging said soma from spot to spot with me. My fingers were crossed almond milk wouldn’t be in the fridge mocking me upon arrival.

It was 😂.

& I even tried again, gave it the best benefit of doubt I could muster, putting my knowing that this brand whose name shall not be written Willfully only puts like 2 almonds per ½gallon of their…milk. . .out of my mind. I was gonna stay On tha mountaintop at least a day.

But I put some of that unholy lactate of distressed demons into my coffee and it turned my tongue so much that even my latest charge was like “shall we go now, or are you gonna just suffer through this? “

My cellular mitochondria have requested full fat, pure as it can be gotten milk since my 30s. I didn’t used to drink it because the midwest got sold hard on fat free milk & country crock, so I’d grown up in a fat free milk zone. But I felt and saw the difference good milk made for me. LA introduced me to legal raw milk in 2016 and there’s been not alot of going back. That’s a whole nother article, tho.

My body loves it. What you won’t do for love, right?

The trek was worth it. Down & back. Is all I’m saying.