#BrowsofBrows|longtime coming…BACK.

kids~they’re lying about alot of it but this one is true:

“dont ef up your brows, they might not come back!”

ya momma’Nem…

Every grown-assed woman knows it can take forever for your brows to return to former glory  when you’ve gotten ridiculous lol.

If theey return at all 🤗 is actually not an exaggeration lol .

Letting them run wild on your face with self grace  as they meander back is/ can be a long-winded trip, especially on a regime that speeds up hair growth everywhere.

(…said regime coming in the upcoming #themag.globalboho.com beauty edition 🤗… it’s not going to be what you think.)

Kokopellima Press

If you’ve been a #tweezerzealot but have not crossed “tha(skinny brow) line” yet…

Ask yer aunties who created & wickedly first rocked all the 90s trends y’all are living for and modifying about the point of no return #skinnybrows wise.

…Better yet, ask your brutally honest uncles about’em.

& take a gander at all these 90s thin-browwed mavens TODAY…& marvel at how much younger they look now sans corpse brows.

Trust me…chiiiilll~

These-beauty monopolies -are gonna be pushing this trend because they’ve pre-loaded all kinds of brow growth, brow lamis, brow kits & other questionable beauty products a few quarters down the lane but need you in a plucking frenzy first 😁. &they’re going to use influencers who don’t know better to try to trigger it.

Remember, globally speaking…They don’t care about you lol.

Hegelian dialectic, but make it fashion( fashist beauty bs .) Look it up. It’s actually a thing.

Come on! Dude-

It’s feminine beauty archetypal destabilization to access wallets.

Brow butchery , For the love of capitalism , bottom-line.

They don’t care about your face being perfectly framed by the right brows… they want a reppppeeeeaaaaat customer who crawls to their counters soaked to the bone with

“please help…. me FIX THESE!” vulnerability …

Because if they hook you & give a modicum of relief to you {the chick currently suffering from their frenzied marketing mindffffuuuucking that you aren’t even connecting them to}, you will be hooked on that dopamine flush of it being fixed and more susceptible to trusting these pirates.


& even though the brunt of beauty company board rooms look like the one in Barbie today, many of today’s juggernauts began or at least existed for generations helmed by women.

Like fashion, the beauty industry was a sector where women could be on the come-up, at a time when entry onto any playing field was rare.

What happened?

Greed keyed to capitalizing on cyclic cognitive dissonances looking in the mirror, perhaps.

Perfect brows are big beauty business, babes. But it’s built on exacerbating you hating, or at least being very insecure…about yours.

And it is easy money playing on a chick’s emotions who is already Topsy turvy due to being programmed to believe in competing in patriarchal social hunger games whathaveyous.

Easy money is tempting. Even to other women.

Look how many celebrities launch licensed hair, makeup & beauty brands using private label bulk beauty products, aiming at a piece of that pie keyed to name cache, innovating nothing.

There are licensing & private label companies thriving on getting those celebrated for their beauty to hock vats of formulations that haven’t changed for 20 years for them, crooning in their ears about cottage industry powers luxury pricepoints & multiple streams of income prowess. & the ego boost of big sells oils the machine. No one talks about the glut of useless product in deep discount bins repetively from these excursions.

Just because they will buy it if your name is on it doesn’t mean it truly Needs to exist.

I’m like do your thing…but truly understand what they’re getting you to do INSTEAD OF deep diving your truest passions all the more.

(Real talk?That’s a whole nother article.)

AND YES…the mores of men are momentarily integral to this madness…

But Baby’s first brow fuck up is one of the few female rites of passage that we can’t wholly blame on patriarchy.

Unless a gay makeup artist with a vendetta against effectively browwed women is the culprit at the root of said latest trend… which is kinda an oxymoron, because by the numbers, one of the first things yer gay bff is gonna do with you is stop you from fucking up your hair with bad bangs and help you figure out your brows. Even if he could give a flying fuck for fashion.

Usually…When it’s done hilariously and badly, we baldly do it to ourselves.

But Why?

It’s the threshold of bodily autonomy your mom is helpless against.

You can be HUNG out to dry for a perm or dyeing your hair… but what can Mother do against your hormonal brow fuckery? NOT MUCH.

& the adrenaline rush of that realization makes most of us uterus reigning youknowwhos see an image, stumble across some tweezers and lose our frickin minds on the top half of our face at least once in life.

To go deeper & darker…It’s all them fucking with perception along “colonizing, reigning over women” lines. In fucked ways you can’t unsee once privy to the sightline.

Wait…How could Overturning Roe vs Wade have Anything to do with them pushing thin brows??

Once they started capitalizing on selling everything back to us at a premium thin, perfectly arched brows were “marketed” as the only “truly feminine” ones…brainwashing brutalized men on the far side of world wars and helping herd the women who’d worked in their absence back home into the kitchen to nurse these broken soldiers.

Maybe…They’re tentatively tenderizing the same cut of that latter day “hate your natural brow/play your part , birther” meat?

You know…slyly Easing components into place… The “right brow” swap is always a factor in a global new look-

Okay, that’d be dark as you know what…


But just like Miranda Priestley didn’t lie about cerulean…

(Go lighter, you dark fantasy doyenne-for the love of God! GEEEZ!)


On a lighter note…

(Thank you !)

I could even bet money on the math mathing regarding… chicks who dig great brows on guys unconsciously… living on the far side of recovery from Self-started brow apocalypses (apocalypsii?)In their distant pasts.

& the aformentioned early Apocalyptii(?) usually then occur a few more times because we black out on what we’ve done to ourselves [#fashistbeautytrauma]hooked on trends, & wake up like “sonafabitch!😩why didn’t you guys stop me???!”

We’ve almost all been there lol, trying to figure it out.

Stop before it’s too late & you’re drawing Caterpillars across yer forehead with indelible ink and calling it fashion to course correct.

& FYI- in fashion mags when they give them scrawny brows/ 20sbrows alot of times they soap them out , glue them out…to block them and paint them back on for effect Without de-browing tha model chick.

You’re not supposed to know how to Do this…but learning it & trying it can satisfy the curiosity of you seeing thinner brows on you without mangling your face🤗:

… it’s been a trip, but a fun one.






Why the comically protective diatribe?

Because I fashistly smell those scrawny brow waving motherfuckers on the wind, that’s why lol.

Another generation of brows must not be decimated for the coffers of beauty conglomerates headed by ugly people who actually Have to hate natural beauty beaming out women TO grow their bottom line(They think).

There are better ways of upholding fellow femme fatales with more sparse brows…starting with telling Every damned body to, for the most part, if they can, just mostly leave yer brows alone outside of stragglers.