Aidan stood up from his desk. His stomach did that weird nervous pulse again that he’d decided he was not going to ignore ever again after the last time, even if doing so made him look like an idiot.

He slid the doorjamb between his shoulder blades and bowed himself around it, stretching the stiff muscles along the back of him and set off.

You’re being ridiculous, 

Maybe, he shrugged.

I can’t believe you actually stopped what you were doing because you “felt-”

He wavered a bit but then caught himself and shook it off with a smile.

You… don’t have to- he muttered to his inner critic, to it’s surprise.

Look! It cried out, mollified, I’m just trying to help-

…the fuck? Hey! …hey! You can’t just- the demon posing as his inner critic called after him. Something in his diffidence was like strychnine to him, rooting it to the floor. HEY! It roared, Somebody!! DO something! 

Demons riding other people at Aidan’s workplace looked up from their assignments and ambled to office doors in time to see him amble past, free.

---

What the fuck did you do?! Hissed the one called Bonebreaker, who’d been on the verge of doing right by its name in the office across the way by encouraging blatant stupidity out of it’s focus.

I- I don’t- nothing! He whispered, panicked. He was sitting there, I was wearing myself out trying to bad associate him and that…that fucking twinge thing happened again out of nowhere!

Why didn’t you shut it down?! One called out in frustration from down the Hall-

You mean, another groaned, throwing it’s hands up in frustration, I’m telling you, that shit is contagious! We’re doomed- 

And you let him get away? Like that? In that state-what the fuck were you thinking, man?!

We’re fucking doomed, man!Game Over! Game ova, maaan-

You know what? Fuck it! I am so tired of this shit! I’m Out!

Jerry, you can’t be out! We’re not allowed to just be “out!” 

What do you think this is, Jerry? A bloated demon chastised his co-conspirator.

“I’m out,” another demon arrogantly chuckled, Who do you think you are, Jerry?? An I’an’I? Out?? You don’t get to just be “Out!” It walked up to Jerry and tapped it in the center of it’s chest. 

Come on, Ron…chill,

You…and your fuckin audacity! You think… you think you actually get to be a you in all of this? You think you’re operating with a fucking ounce of autonomy in Any of this? You are not a fucking “you,” you pompous prick! The demon hissed. “In any and every fucking thing You do, you are a FUCKING WE, for fucking eternity! WE ARE LEGION! Do you fucking understand that, Jerry?

The demonic forces lining the hall of the office floor muttered amongst themselves.

See! It’s fucking spreading already! A panicked, bespeckled minion known for orchestrating the most incandescent energy vampiric feeding events imaginable wailed. It held onto his cheap, misshapen blazer and rocked back and forth, doing his best to stim towards to some semblance of calm. Oh Boy, ohhh boy~ he chattered to himself.

Not Jerry, Not fucking Jerry!! another wailed down the hall.

Collateral damage’s already begun- a demon that still called herself Sharon hooted softly.

Her demonic retinue groaned.

Not today, I’m not! Sharon pouted, today’s it’s fucking Jerry-she said, unable to hide that she was a little proud of him for it, too.

What are we gonna do? What the fuck are we gonna do?

“Fuck you, Ron,” Jerry muttered, a faint resurgence of his relatively recent humanity flooded up to the surface of his dark spirit. 

The demonic Host collectively gasped.

Fuck you think this is, Office Space?  What do you think you’re doing, huh? Rallying the troops with your lil This is Sparta-esque speech? Fuck you, Ron! I’m out! I’m cutting my losses! You wanna wait around, see how this goes now that Faith has shown up-

The demonic host collectively gasped at him having had the audacity to utter the blasphemous in reverse word to them so casually that it made them all quake in their boots-

Yes Faith! Fucking faith, guys! That’s what it was! We ALL KNOW that’s what the fuck it was , and we, standing together or apart are no fucking use in the the vicinity of IT, Jerry hissed. Now you can keep sowing your fucked up oats if you want to, he growled, pointing accusingly at his brethren, But iii am cutting my fucking losses here. He listened to his fucking gut, plain as night or fucking day! Fuck it! I-I have other charges lives to fucking fuck up that are not around this fucking watering hole. 

You can’t just fucking leave! We’re not allowed to leave our-

Fucking Watch me!

That’s not how this works, Jerry! That’s not how Any of this works-  a demon called out to no avail, exasperated.

---

Aidan sat in the cab of his truck feeling freer than he’d felt in ages. 

He put his phone down into his lap, consciously giving space for anything capable of talking him out of it to do so. Silence sat with him and, thinking of her, he didn’t feel alone. 

He turned the truck on, paused, closed his eyes and clicked on the radio. Desecration Smile by the Red Hot Chili Peppers flooded into the space. He grinned in victory.

It was her favorite band, singing one of her favorite songs. One even she’d had to admit the lyrics of made absolutely no sense in, when pressed.

His stomach twinged again. It was faith, not fear. It was her. Wherever she was. Thinking of him. And she needed him. To show and prove…that he could hear.

He slid out of the parking lot, into traffic and headed for the shore to hunt her down. Not knowing anything else except she’d bubble up by the water sometime within the next 36, but nowhere near the wet sand that comically disgusted her if it were not pristine. Which it rarely was in these parts.

Never in the wrong time or wrong place… he sang softly to himself, believing against everything to the contrary that she’d bloom somewhere he’d be able to find in no time.

He was gonna get there…and wait. Probably Meditate…to make it louder, he murmured to himself.

---

Jerry turned on his heels and crossed back over the threshold into his torture chamber that looked exactly like a run of the mill HR office, gathered the tools of his sadistic trade, and sailed back into the deathly silent hall as the demons rabble-rabbled amongst themselves.

He came back out and got in the face of the demon that had tried to dress him down in front of his malicious peers. And STOP trying to make LEGION Happen, ya prick! He snarked. Weee~ he gesticulated wildly towards himself and the cohort behind him are not defined by the likes of you! You’re not even Fucking Legion yourself! Don’t try to wrap all of us in that festering shell of yours and call it “legion,” ya fucking twat! You’re not Legion, you were a fucking Lecherous Liege, Ron! A LIEGE, not LEGION, for fucks sake! Stop trying to make Legion happen! YOU don’t get to make that fucking call! He snarled, then smiled. He’s out? I’m facking out-Deuces~!

The demonic entity still called Jerry to this day sauntered down the hall, invincible. He walked past her and paused, not looking back.

Are you coming with me? Or are you gonna stick around for another eternity’s worth of their fucking abuse, Sharon?

But… what are we gonna do, Jerry?

I don’t know Sharon!! But it’s gotta be better than what we put up with here!

Oh, no! Not sharon too! The bespeckled one whined.

Fucking take her! She always half-ass tortures her charges anyways-

Get her the fuck outta here!

Nervously, the demon Sharon who’d once been the most short-sighted Karen on the planet grasped hands with Jerry from behind and they strode towards the exit door.

Fuck you, Sharon!

The rickety, smudged glass door ripped open onto all of hell on earth that was theirs for the taking, if they wanted to be bothered with it. 

They looked at each other with what was left of their biological ocular capacities and scrounged inside of themselves for anything remotely resembling that thing called love that they’d never believed in on the upside, now that they were down. For it all, forever, with one another.

Out of nowhere, the liege hellbent on making Legion happen barreled down the hallway and out the door into the parking lot to accost them for walking off the job.

Fuck you Sharon! & Fuckety Fuck you, Jerry! 

Whatever, my Liege~! Sharon tittered.

FUCK YEW~ Ron started to scream, his bellow catching in his throat just as a hound of hell and a spawn of satan slithered up out of nowhere and sniffed him, grunting wildly. Uh-oh, he winced. In a flash they pounced on him and ripped him apart limb from limb, in judgment. For fucks-he wailed.

Fucking fucktwat of a- Jerry muttered as he and Sharon walked off in to the fiery expanse of hell, leaving Liege and the minions behind… together.

The ferociously churning, inverted sky above them softened a little as it looked down upon them.

Even in hell, love lived.

© AngelBrynner 2025